It has been a while since my last post and so many things have changed. I have experienced God is such new and intimate ways in the past few months. My last post was not long after I arrived back home and this post comes the day before I start my junior year at DBU. In my last entry I said I did not know what to expect upon my arrival in Texas- I didn't realize how right I was. Only God could have prepared me for what was about to take place.
The past 6 months have been extremely hard, stressful, painful, but oh so rewarding and such a blessing. I had the privilege of witnessing my father take his last breath on this earth after years and years of suffering. As my family and I gathered around my dad's hospital bed, holding hands and crying and praising the Father, we watched as my father saw Glory. I can't help but smile when I think back to that exact moment. The Holy Spirit was in that room and filled each one of our bodies. Not knowing what to expect is putting it mildly but what we experienced can only be described as an encounter with God himself. The Bible talks about 'the peace of God that surpasses all understanding' (Philippians 4:7) and there is no doubt in my mind that my family and I had that peace poured out on us.
Living life without my dad has been one of the hardest things I have ever done, but I bet you already knew that. I miss him every single second but those seconds are so worth it because I know that it means my dad is in the presence of the God of the universe. My dad lived the last 18 years of his life for that God and now he gets to spend eternity with him. WOW. What we have to look forward to.
It has been over two months since my dad left this earth. Two challenging months for my family and me to learn to lean on God in a new way. Two challenging months for us to learn how to live without my dad, to learn how to function with a big hole in our hearts. But for my dad it has been the blink of an eye at the feet of the Most High. One of my dad's favorite verses from a song comes from Amazing Grace and it says: "when we've been there ten thousand years, bright shining as the sun, we've no less days to sing God's praise than when we'd first begun." My dad loved that verse in Amazing Grace and now he is getting to live it! So yes, my heart hurts and my eyes sting from the tears that fall but nothing compares to the peace my God gives me and the blessed assurance that my dad is healed and will never hurt again. Praise Him! My dad beginning eternity is the most life changing thing to occur since I secured my place in eternity and won't be the last. It might always be the 'biggest' but certainly not the last.
Like I said, the past two months have been hard, duh, but they have also been FULL of other things too, mostly blessings and change. God has blessed me with the privilage of continuing my education at DBU, finding an amazing house on campus, getting a job, and oh yeah, a new car:) Thank you Lord(and the Brosins)!
I always knew my mom was a fighter, warrier (like Xena:)), source of strength and a wonderful caretaker but over the past few months her status has gone to superhero! WOW, that woman. How grateful I am to have her blood run through my veins. She is a constant inspiration to me and I can't help but think of the smile she must keep on God's face. I know I'm proud of her and I'm just her daughter. I see new attributes of God thanks to her example. Thank you Lord for her.
My family has been such a support as well as church family and the community. Just when you think people can't be any nicer or encouraging or helpful, God just goes and shows out. Thank you Lord for them.
Tomorrow brings the first day classes at DBU- my first day to attend classes on campus since I left for Hong Kong. I know more change is just waiting for me around the corner but if I've learned anything it's that God doesn't change no matter how my circumstances do. Thank you Lord for being YOU.
James 1: 2-8
"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does"
